Should you pay for a consultant?

It depends, and anyone who tells you otherwise is probably selling something.

Start with the honest part: this process isn't fair, it isn't equitable, and it isn't especially age-appropriate. We ask thirteen- and fourteen-year-olds to interview, write essays, and perform on tours, and we ask their parenting adults to project-manage all of it on top of their actual lives. So if hiring help makes that more bearable and it fits your budget, there is nothing wrong with it. And if you'd rather do it yourselves, plenty of families do. We did, and it worked out fine.

It helps to know there isn't one single thing called "a consultant." There are a few.

A writing or essay consultant works with your student on their applications. This can be a real gift, especially if you have a teenager who would rather do almost anything than take feedback from you (which is to say, a teenager), or a student who needs a little extra support around a learning difference. Sometimes a calm outside voice gets more done in an hour than a parent can in a whole weekend.

A full admissions consultant is broader. They help you build a list, manage the calendar, prep for interviews, and hold your hand through the process. Some families find that worth every dollar. Whether it's worth it to you comes down to how much of the load you want to carry yourself, and how much certainty you're trying to buy.

Two things to hold onto. First, it is an option, not a requirement. You are not behind, and you are not failing your student, if you skip it. Second, it can be expensive, and for many families it's simply out of reach. That's worth saying plainly, because this process already asks enough of people without piling on shame.